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Jul. 20th, 2005 @ 10:20 pm Part 7: Harry.

The walk back to Gryffindor took ages, and with each step Harry was more uncomfortably aware of Snape's eyes burning into the place between his shoulder blades. It made his skin crawl and his pulse race, and by the time they neared his dormitory, Harry was practically running. He skidded to a halt in front of the Fat Lady, and then looked anxiously back at Snape, who wasn't nearly as far away as Harry wanted him to be.

'Do you honestly believe I don't know the password?' Snape asked, stalking up to the landing.

Harry curled his lip. 'No, sir. I just didn't know if you wanted to--' He stammered to a halt as Snape raised an insinuating eyebrow.

'If I wanted to what?'

'Nothing, sir,' Harry muttered, not really sure he knew the answer anyway. He didn't want to know what Snape wanted. 'Never mind. I'll just--whatever.' He turned back to the Fat Lady.

'One drop, Potter.'

'What?' He glanced back over his shoulder to where Snape was lurking near the wall, arms folded over his chest.

'Dreamless Sleep. Being as it is now half-three in the morning, two drops would be excessive.'

'Yeah, okay,' Harry said. Like he was going to take any of Snape's stupid potion. It was probably poisoned, or some kind of nightmare potion. 'Can I go?'

'Certainly,' Snape said smoothly, his face twisting into an ugly smirk. 'Pleasant dreams.'

Harry ground his teeth, muttered the password, and climbed through the portrait hole as quickly as he could manage. Glancing back as the portrait swung shut behind him, he caught one last glimpse of Snape, stock-still and staring at the place Harry had just been.

*

Once inside, Harry wasn't sure what to do. His head was spinning and his skin was tingling and rage and shame were warring within him, leaving him drained and confused. He didn't know what was wrong with him, didn't understand what had happened in the dungeons, how he could hate Snape so much and still -- and still do what he'd done. He felt dirty and sick to his stomach, and his only consolation was that Snape obviously hadn't noticed. There was no way Snape would pass up such a good opportunity to humiliate him.

Harry shuddered and went to take a long, lukewarm shower.

He felt slightly better when he'd finished, and when he crawled into bed, he pulled the curtains and dug out the map. He scanned for Black, and then Snape, but didn't see either one of them. Eyes narrowing in suspicion, he looked more carefully, but there was still no sign of them. Harry chewed on his bottom lip, thinking.

It couldn't be good. Snape had obviously figured out some way to hide from the map. What if Black figured it out -- or worse, already had? He could have been in the castle the whole time, and Harry never would have known. Snape could be hiding both of them, could be waiting for the right moment to get rid of Harry. Maybe that's why he wanted Harry in the dungeons for the rest of the holidays, to make it easier for Black.

Harry felt bile rise to the back of his throat, and he swallowed around it and pushed the hair out of his eyes. He took a deep breath; he needed to calm down. Black was mad, everyone said so, and if he were in the castle, he would have attacked already. He'd had plenty of chances. The real problem was that Snape was -- getting to him. Distracting him, confusing him, and Harry felt more than a little mad himself. He had no idea how he was going to survive the next ten days with Snape.

*

'You have to do what?!' Ron looked outraged. Harry didn't blame him.

'What did you do, Harry?'

Harry tried to glare at Hermione for automatically assuming he'd done something wrong, but since he had, he couldn't quite blame her.

'I told you Snape was up to something, didn't I? Last night when I looked at the Marauder's Map, he wasn't there. I -- I went to look for him. He caught me. Said I have to spend every daylight hour of the hols with him, in the dungeons.'

Ron looked like he was going to be sick, which was exactly how Harry felt. 'That's not fair! Is he serious?'

'Yeah,' Harry mumbled dejectedly. 'And he took my Cloak.'

'Well, Harry, you really shouldn't have been wandering around by yourself in the middle of the night,' Hermione said. 'Not with Black on the loose and--'

'I can't believe it!' Ron said with a glare in her direction. 'You actually think it's all right for Snape to just -- to just steal Harry's holidays like this.'

'Of course I don't,' she snapped back. 'But I do worry about Harry, and you should, too! He shouldn't be--'

'Er,' Harry interrupted, wanting to stop them before they stopped speaking to one another again. They turned to look at him. 'Let's just go to breakfast,' he said. 'I shouldn't have gone, but I did, and I got caught, and there's nothing I can do about it now. Maybe being in the dungeons will give me a chance to figure out what Snape is up to.'

Hermione rolled her eyes. 'I really don't think he's up to anything, Harry.'

'It's Snape,' Ron said. 'Of course he's up to something.'

Hermione made an exasperated noise, but Harry cut her off before she could say anything. 'Either way,' he said, shoving several books on Hippogriffs into his bag and then throwing it over his shoulder. 'I'm stuck with him. Let's go.'

*

Snape, fortunately, wasn't at breakfast, which gave Harry the chance to eat in peace. He was grateful for that, at least; he wasn't able to eat much as it was, and with Snape there, he probably wouldn't have been able to eat at all. He still felt a bit sick, and he wasn't sure if it was nerves or lingering disgust over what had happened the night before.

Still, Harry drew out his breakfast, eating as slowly as he could and trying to delay the moment when he'd be alone with Snape in the dungeons. One by one, the teachers and other students filed out, until it was only Harry, Ron and Hermione left at the table.

'I should probably go,' Harry said, but he couldn't quite bring himself to move. He was still sitting there, poking absently at his toast, when the side door crashed open. He swore inwardly.

'Mr Potter.' Snape's voice lashed out across the room, and Harry winced. 'Enjoying yourself?'

'I was,' Harry snapped, and then bit down hard on his tongue. Hermione's eyes widened, and Harry slid his chair out and stood up. 'I overslept, all right? I was just about to come down there.' He paused, and then thought better of goading Snape more than he already had. 'Sir.'

He doubted Snape would buy his line about oversleeping; Harry hadn't slept in days, and he knew he looked horrible. His mirror had practically called him a zombie. He turned to face Snape, whose black eyes narrowed instantly and raked over him. Harry ground his teeth and forced himself to stand still under Snape's inspection. He was fully expecting Snape to say something, call him on the lie, but instead he just arched an eyebrow and jerked the door back open. 'Well?'

'See you at lunch,' Harry mumbled to Ron and Hermione, and then he slung his bag over his shoulder and trudged down to the dungeons with Snape.

*

By the time they got down there, Harry had managed to work himself into a temper. It was completely unfair; Harry had stayed in the common room all day, every day, trying to help Hagrid. He hadn't wandered at all, and the only time he had, he'd got caught.

He couldn't believe he was going to have to do this every morning, leave his friends and go off to the dungeons. And what about Christmas itself? There was no way he was going to spend it with Snape. Maybe Dumbledore could help him, if Harry ever got the chance to speak to him. He hadn't been at breakfast, either, and Harry wondered if the headmaster knew that Snape was keeping Harry in the dungeons.

Probably, he groused to himself. Snape had likely made up some story about how Harry wandered around looking for Black all the time, and someone needed to keep an eye on him. But Snape had to know Harry'd spent most of his time in Gryffindor, and he was just trying to ruin Harry's holidays. Harry was determined not to let him. At least he'd still be able to help Hagrid.

When they got to his office, Snape put his hand on the door to dispel the wards, and Harry didn't even wait. He yanked the door open and marched into the office, looking around quickly. He thought he remembered -- there. A dusty old armchair in the back corner, stacked with books and pieces of parchment. He walked over and was tempted to just dump everything on the floor, but he managed to stop himself. But he did move everything, placing it on the floor in neat piles so he could put it back the way it was later. He felt Snape's eyes on him the entire time, but he didn't say anything, so Harry ignored him.

Once the chair was clear, he dug in his bag for one of the books, sat down, curled his legs underneath him, and started to read. He made it through the first paragraph.

'What do you think you're doing?'

Harry didn't look up. 'What's it look like I'm doing, sir? I'm reading. You're not allowed to give me detention during holidays, so I can do what I want.'

Snape was quiet for a few seconds, and Harry tried to concentrate on the words in front of him.

'And what book has you so engrossed that you're willing to spend your holidays reading it?'

Harry ground his teeth. Why couldn't Snape just let him read? 'The History of Heroic Hippogriffs,' he muttered, a slight sinking feeling in his stomach. There was no way Snape was going to believe he was actually interested in the subject.

There was another period of silence, a bit longer, and Harry hoped Snape had decided to let him read in peace.

'I think not, Mr Potter. You'll put aside that book.'

'What? Why?' Harry snapped, slamming the book shut and finally glaring up at Snape, who was standing in front of his desk, arms crossed. 'I'm reading. What's wrong with reading, Professor?'

'Do not question me again,' Snape said, his voice low and his eyes flashing dangerously. 'You will. Put aside. That book.' He took a step forwards and Harry swallowed nervously, flinching backwards despite himself. 'Now, Potter.'

Harry swallowed again, sighed, and tried to dredge up an apologetic tone. 'Sorry, sir. I just -- I thought it would be okay. To read. You only said you wanted to keep an eye on me. And this isn't a detention.'

'No, I suppose it's not,' Snape said quietly, and Harry felt his insides clench. 'But it most certainly is a punishment.'
About this Entry
im - mask
atrata:
From:yanks02
Date:July 21st, 2005 03:55 am (UTC)
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N'awwww. I love how utterly naive Harry is. You just keep on thinking Snape doesn't know what happened.
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From:atrata
Date:July 21st, 2005 03:59 am (UTC)
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Innit he cute? *grin*

I think one of these days he's going to be in for a nasty shock.
From:cravache
Date:July 21st, 2005 04:02 am (UTC)
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Oh, I was just wondering when this would be updated, when--'lo and behold!

Harry is so brazen. Even after what happened, with him in the corridor at night with Snape--humiliated though he undoubtedly was--it is typical Harry to be so upfront and defiant to Snape. Even though, as you wrote, Harry has himself convinced that Snape never noticed Harry's little frot-induced jizz.

And, heh, this: he caught one last glimpse of Snape, stock-still and staring at the place Harry had just been. There is something really creepy about this. I guess after seeing how much enjoyment Snape got out of watching Harry cream himself, just the idea of him standing there, staring at the spot Harry was just in, I can just picture the indecent, satisifed thoughts that are swirling through the professor's mind.

Yey, so glad you updated! Am enjoying this series immensely.
From:switchknife
Date:July 21st, 2005 04:03 am (UTC)
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I can just picture the indecent, satisifed thoughts that are swirling through the professor's mind.

Oh, you have no idea.

*licks fingers*
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From:phaballa
Date:July 21st, 2005 04:09 am (UTC)
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Oh god. Punishment. PleasE? Soon?
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From:atrata
Date:July 21st, 2005 04:10 am (UTC)
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*grin*

Talk to Switch. That's not my department. ;)
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From:viverra_libro
Date:July 21st, 2005 04:14 am (UTC)
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Poor Harry! He's all circumspect again, now that it's daylight. And Snape does seem pretty unreasonable. ::hides from switch::
From:switchknife
Date:July 21st, 2005 04:26 am (UTC)
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And Snape does seem pretty unreasonable.

I beg your pardon--the brat deserves it! Wandering about like that, endangering himself--but he's perfectly safe when he's with ME, damn it. The most I can do is take his virginity!
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From:atrata
Date:July 21st, 2005 07:05 am (UTC)
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You ARE twelve! But, uh, so am I, apparently. I'm all snickery. :P
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From:mirrorwakes
Date:July 21st, 2005 11:05 am (UTC)
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Ohhh yeeeeaaahhh! Angst. Angst. Angst! Thank you very muchly for updating :)!
*not worthy*

Mirror
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From:atrata
Date:July 21st, 2005 11:46 am (UTC)
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Thank you very muchly for reading! I'm glad you're enjoying it. :D
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From:left_enthusiasm
Date:July 21st, 2005 06:57 pm (UTC)
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An update! So happy!

It sure seems like Snape has already had *some* sort of influence on Harry. He actually *accepted* the fact that there are consequences to his actions, and faced them. I guess the only way to get away from them would be to jump off a cliff though, and I think that Snape would make him go down to the dungeons even then.
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From:atrata
Date:July 22nd, 2005 05:09 am (UTC)
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Yeah, at the bottom of the cliff? Dungeons. Harry's fucked. Er. Well, not yet. But we hope he will be. *grin*

Thanks for reading! :D
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From:ariadneelda
Date:July 21st, 2005 11:01 pm (UTC)
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He felt dirty and sick to his stomach, and his only consolation was that Snape obviously hadn't noticed.

Heh, I love how Harry keeps being so naïve and innocent about it. *g*

'No, I suppose it's not,' Snape said quietly, and Harry felt his insides clench. 'But it most certainly is a punishment.'

Now, can you really blame Snape? The boy was asking for a punishment, being so deliciously defiant and all. *wicked grin*

You write Harry wonderfully!
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From:atrata
Date:July 22nd, 2005 05:21 am (UTC)
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Thank you! :D

And yeah, I think Harry's going to be in for a nasty surprise one of these days, when he realizes Snape isn't half as clueless as Harry thinks he is. *rubs hands together*
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From:reddwarfer
Date:July 24th, 2005 05:48 am (UTC)
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Why, pray tell, is defiance so delicious?
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From:atrata
Date:July 24th, 2005 05:54 am (UTC)
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Y'know, I have absolutely no idea. This is why I'm the sub. :)

(And I totally owe you feedback on the bit of chan you linked me to last week. I'm getting there, I swear.)
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From:djin7
Date:July 24th, 2005 06:21 am (UTC)
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I can't believe how late I am to the party. I must have missed this update *iz brain ded*. No matter, I am here now. Oooh, how I love Petulant!Disgruntled!Harry. Nummy. Love his little show of power there. Our boy is trying so hard to be tough. He really has very little chance of it, against Severus. However, every small victory counts when faced with a predator foe like Snape, and getting Snape to admit Harry is not there for detention and that he cannot give him such during the holidays is a small, but significant victory, don't you think?
Great work, as always, Atra. I await your next with glee,
cheers!
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From:atrata
Date:July 24th, 2005 06:42 am (UTC)
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Hey, it's never too late to show up to the party. :)

...getting Snape to admit Harry is not there for detention and that he cannot give him such during the holidays is a small, but significant victory, don't you think?

Hmmm... I hadn't thought about it that way. I mean, there's not much practical difference between detention and punishment. Harry still has to do what Snape says. And any power he does have over Snape (which you noted in your comment to Switch), he's not aware of. Which is probably the only reason he has it. But anyway.

The next parts should be up soonish. :)
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From:wildestranger
Date:July 25th, 2005 03:36 pm (UTC)
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Most delightful. That last line was just delicious.
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From:atrata
Date:July 27th, 2005 03:15 am (UTC)
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Thanks! :D
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From:lookfar
Date:July 26th, 2005 03:17 am (UTC)
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Nice writing. I liked Snape staring at the portrait hole as Harry passed through. I suppose my wish is that Snape will be pulled in more than he expects.
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From:atrata
Date:July 27th, 2005 03:15 am (UTC)
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Oh, I don't think that's out of the question. *grin*

Thanks for reading. :D
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From:chrissy_sky
Date:July 29th, 2005 08:19 am (UTC)
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'I'm stuck with him.

That's almost romantic. Almost. If it's taken out of context.

*coughs* Sorry. It just kinda amused me.